Life has taught me that I do not always have control over what comes into my life, only in how I choose to respond to things. I certainly didn't choose to have breast cancer, but I did choose to not let that diagnosis define how I would experience this medical adventure. I came to realize that everything that comes before me has the potential to transform and expand me, only if I am willing to walk with, and embrace the unknown. The trick is in believing that in the heart of challenges exists a treasured gift.

I remember those initial feelings of anger and fear that flooded every pore of my being when I was first informed of the diagnosis breast cancer. I kept wondering, "Am I going to die? How can this be happening to me? I have a husband and son who need me!" In one quick moment in time, my life had just been turned upside down and I felt very scared. While I knew it was important for those feelings to be acknowledged, I also knew how imperative it was to transcend those feelings and embrace this diagnosis with a positive attitude. I was determined to see a rainbow in the sky every day the choice was mine.

So my mission became clear to wake up every morning with the intention of having a glorious day- with a heart filled with gratitude for all that I have. I knew this was possible if I chose to consciously stay focused in the present moment, for it had become clear to me that that's where the seeds of faith and trust are born and are nourished. But I must confess, surrendering to that sacred space was not always easy, as my mind had such a successful history of bouncing around from the past to the future. Yet, when I did, my day unfolded with much more peace, joy and tranquility, and the fears just melted away.

In order to help me as I wandered through this time I began to immerse myself in art, something I rarely did. However, while impatiently waiting for medical appointments I'd take out a pen and paper and begin to "doodle" in an effort to reduce the anxiety and worry that I felt stirring from within. The more I doodled, the more relaxed I became. When I returned home I continued with this art form as it provided me with many hours of relaxation and enjoyment. I created one guideline for myself to begin and end each doodle outline at the same point, without lifting the pen off the paper. I wanted to genuinely experience a trust in the creativity of a spontaneous moment in time. This art form became a spiritual practice for me an open-eyed meditation. I had become so focused on the joy of creating, while learning how to trust and have faith in the process. While I had no idea what the finished product would look like, I began to see that there were never any mistakes! This free, spontaneous expression always created something of beauty. I was truly amazed! It was a magical time for me as I began to see the correlation between this art form and life itself. Both are about immersing oneself in a sacred journey between two points. No matter where one travels, a beautiful adventure awaits. There are no wrong turns, for in every turn perfection is created. The only mistake is in forgetting to slow down long enough in order to connect with the treasures that are right in front of, and within us.

I've come to appreciate that challenges come in all sizes, shapes and colors, and arrive when least expected. That's what makes their experience so fascinating.

Over the years, I've learned to embrace the unexpected with a sense of trust, having faith that I receive no more than I truly have the capacity to handle, and with the understanding that I'm never alone. I also discovered the more difficult the challenge, the more determined I am to embrace them as a treasured gift. With that understanding I've been able to separate myself from the actual outer event and focus my attention inward, where the heart of a courageous warrior resides. I discovered that the more I'm able to travel and roam within that sacred space, the more connected I become to the essence of who I truly am. Within that space exists all the courage, strength, faith and trust that I could ever need. By staying focused in that space I've also learned the importance of staying focused in the present moment, where life was meant to be experienced. Once I tasted the preciousness of the present moment I understood how transient these outer events were, and at the same time experienced the healing power of the human spirit.

Breast cancer was the bait and certainly caused me to wake up and take stock of everything that I thought was real. I was quick to learn that I don't always have a choice as to what comes into my life, only in how I choose to respond. The choice to embrace this diagnosis as a gift came with the knowing that everything is fine, just as presented, with a profound knowing that nothing happens to us just for us.

Life didn't present me with breast cancer! It presented me with a challenge, and one filled with an abundance of treasures just waiting for me to discover. I was able to experience this adventure from a higher place and bask in the glory of new found wisdom and joy, peace and contentment. Had I chosen fear to be my driving force, I would have remained blocked and unable to know my own greatness. It was courage that lead me to victory a victory of the spirit.

Condensed from Connections the Sacred Journey Between Two Points

ISBN 0-9700684-0-9 $19.95 141 pages

For information about seminars and workshops contact:

Carol Ross Edmonston

P.O. Box 5023 • Fullerton, CA 92838 USA

Telephone: (714) 870-5695 " Fax (714) 870-5229

Original Art Purchase and Commissions.

Book: Connections...the Sacred Journey Between Two Points
- a written journey through breast cancer including art.

Workshops: Once Upon a Doodle - an upbeat and interactive workshop. Join Carol as she shares how she learned to reduce anxiety and stress in everyday life by shifting focus to the present moment, as experienced through spontaneous doodle art. No artistic skills necessary, as the focus is on the journey of creation, and not the finished product.